Every day children across the nation try to find excuses not to go to school. They say their stomach hurts or they suddenly have a cough, but parents know that the issue is far deeper than a fleeting aliment.
No school is immune to bullying. According to the National Youth
Violence Prevention Resource Center, more than 5.7 million children are
dealing with the issue of bullying in school.
For one Essex, VT family, this issue has touched their lives more than they could have ever imagined.
Since the fifth grade, Ryan Halligan had been ruthlessly bullied in school by one particular classmate, be it for his shortcomings as an athlete or when he lost his place while reading in class.
When Ryan was two-years-old, his parents and doctors were concerned that he was not developing correctly. He wasn't talking or walking-normal milestones for a two-year-old child. Because of his late development, Ryan qualified for early intervention services and special education. By the time he was in third grade though, Ryan had caught up with the rest of his classmates and was able to join them in standard classes.
While in his own mind Ryan accepted his struggles and dealt with them in his own way, the more popular students still recognized his shortcomings and made sure everyone else did too.
While Ryan's parents knew that he was having a tough time, they never grasped the full scope of the abuse Ryan was dealing with at school until it was too late.
On Oct. 7, 2003, Ryan Halligan took his own life to escape the torture of going to school and facing bullies.
A new phenomenon around this time for parents of teenagers was the emergence of Instant Messaging on the internet. Ryan's father, John, began to notice that he was spending more and more time on the computer talking with friends, so John set up guidelines: no talking to strangers, no giving out personal details and no secret passwords.
"I told my children, 'God forbid something ever happens, I want to be able to see who you have been talking to.' It was a safety measure," Halligan said.
When dealing with the aftermath of Ryan's suicide, Hallgian logged on to his son's Instant Messenger and began to look for reasons why such a young boy felt so lost and despondent that he had to take his life to escape it. Through his readings, Halligan discovered that Ryan was not only tormented at school, but he was also experiencing what is called "cyberbullying."
"Kids will say just about anything when they are hiding behind a computer screen. A girl gained my son's trust and humiliated him to all of his classmates," Halligan explained.
The day Ryan committed suicide, he told the girl that 'it is girls like you that make me want to kill myself."
As Halligan presented Ryan's story to the Schuylerville Middle School recently, he urged the students never to stand on the sidelines when they notice someone being bullied.
"Being a bystander is just as much of a problem as being the bully. Too many people stand to the side and laugh. Not enough people step in to help, and this could have saved lives," he said.
While Ryan's death empowered the Halligan family to get a law passed about bullying in schools, New York has no such law.
"I urge you all to write to your elected officials to get protection for yourselves and your friends," he said. "I'm hoping to reach as many young people as I can and tell them to be careful about how you treat each other, especially online. It's so easy to hide behind a screen and make fun of others."
At Schuylerville Central School District, elementary school counselor Cassandra Sheahan said they are not immune to bullying.
"We see it every day here, and we have no magic trick to make it go away - no one does," she said. "We are now emphasizing the importance of not standing by and letting bullying take place. This is a serious problem that needs to be combated everywhere."
Halligan said that when he was a student, he had a handful of teachers that really left a mark on him, but one teacher in particular left a lasting impression.
"She told us that we can always turn an ink blot into a butterfly. We can learn from a mistake and make things better from it," he said. "I never got to share that lesson with Ryan, so now I'm sharing it with you."
To learn more about Ryan's story and how to contact elected officials about an anti-bullying law, visit www.ryanpatrickhalligan.com.
For one Essex, VT family, this issue has touched their lives more than they could have ever imagined.
Since the fifth grade, Ryan Halligan had been ruthlessly bullied in school by one particular classmate, be it for his shortcomings as an athlete or when he lost his place while reading in class.
When Ryan was two-years-old, his parents and doctors were concerned that he was not developing correctly. He wasn't talking or walking-normal milestones for a two-year-old child. Because of his late development, Ryan qualified for early intervention services and special education. By the time he was in third grade though, Ryan had caught up with the rest of his classmates and was able to join them in standard classes.
While in his own mind Ryan accepted his struggles and dealt with them in his own way, the more popular students still recognized his shortcomings and made sure everyone else did too.
While Ryan's parents knew that he was having a tough time, they never grasped the full scope of the abuse Ryan was dealing with at school until it was too late.
On Oct. 7, 2003, Ryan Halligan took his own life to escape the torture of going to school and facing bullies.
A new phenomenon around this time for parents of teenagers was the emergence of Instant Messaging on the internet. Ryan's father, John, began to notice that he was spending more and more time on the computer talking with friends, so John set up guidelines: no talking to strangers, no giving out personal details and no secret passwords.
"I told my children, 'God forbid something ever happens, I want to be able to see who you have been talking to.' It was a safety measure," Halligan said.
When dealing with the aftermath of Ryan's suicide, Hallgian logged on to his son's Instant Messenger and began to look for reasons why such a young boy felt so lost and despondent that he had to take his life to escape it. Through his readings, Halligan discovered that Ryan was not only tormented at school, but he was also experiencing what is called "cyberbullying."
"Kids will say just about anything when they are hiding behind a computer screen. A girl gained my son's trust and humiliated him to all of his classmates," Halligan explained.
The day Ryan committed suicide, he told the girl that 'it is girls like you that make me want to kill myself."
As Halligan presented Ryan's story to the Schuylerville Middle School recently, he urged the students never to stand on the sidelines when they notice someone being bullied.
"Being a bystander is just as much of a problem as being the bully. Too many people stand to the side and laugh. Not enough people step in to help, and this could have saved lives," he said.
While Ryan's death empowered the Halligan family to get a law passed about bullying in schools, New York has no such law.
"I urge you all to write to your elected officials to get protection for yourselves and your friends," he said. "I'm hoping to reach as many young people as I can and tell them to be careful about how you treat each other, especially online. It's so easy to hide behind a screen and make fun of others."
At Schuylerville Central School District, elementary school counselor Cassandra Sheahan said they are not immune to bullying.
"We see it every day here, and we have no magic trick to make it go away - no one does," she said. "We are now emphasizing the importance of not standing by and letting bullying take place. This is a serious problem that needs to be combated everywhere."
Halligan said that when he was a student, he had a handful of teachers that really left a mark on him, but one teacher in particular left a lasting impression.
"She told us that we can always turn an ink blot into a butterfly. We can learn from a mistake and make things better from it," he said. "I never got to share that lesson with Ryan, so now I'm sharing it with you."
To learn more about Ryan's story and how to contact elected officials about an anti-bullying law, visit www.ryanpatrickhalligan.com.
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