…and I can not lie. Yup – just like Sir Mix-a-Lot raps in his monster early-’90s hit, “Baby Got Back,” I love big butts. What can I say? Those bulging muscles and popping veins have me hooked. As soon as one of those majestic creatures walk, trot or gallop by, I stop and stare at their lofty hindquarters. And recently I found out I was on the right, umm, track when it comes to choosing a race horse. (No, I’m not a member of some weird horse cult; what were you thinking?)
The 91st Annual Fasig-Tipton Saratoga Yearling Sale was held this past Monday and Tuesday. I attended both nights – but from two different viewpoints.
Monday, I caught up with my new track friend, Billy. Billy is part of a group ownership in Kentucky with around 30 horses in their stable. Tagging along with him, I was able to decipher the yearling sales book. For someone who knows only enough about horse racing to be dangerous, I needed guidance on how to follow the pedigree. Basically, this book covers three generations of racing history. Think of it as the CliffsNotes of buying a horse.
We started outside, where the horses are modeled around a circle while horse racing enthusiasts and potential buyers check out their physiques — which is where we come to those magnificent butts! I’m told by Billy that the horse’s derrière is where its strength comes from. In other words, the bigger the butt, the stronger the horse.
After the first 40 horses were shown, we dipped inside for the actual bidding, sitting just a few rows behind celebrity chef and horse owner Bobby Flay. No, I did not see him bid. However, the gentleman who bought the $950,000 horse was just off to my side. And I did witness the evening’s top seller, a Medaglia d’Oro colt (Hip Number 56) that sold for a whopping $1.2 million. Sheikh Mohammed was the top bidder (no surprise).
As much as I’m in awe of the horse’s ass, I can’t help but marvel at the auctioneer. WOW and HOLY COW. How do they keep it straight? I’ve seen fewer crazy hand signals at a Yankee game! It is amazing. I’ve done my share of charity auctioneering and after the third bid, I usually lose my train of thought and turn to the crowd to remind me where I’m at. I doubt I’ll be asked again, but if I am, it might be best to gracefully decline the invitation.
Billy’s bloodstock agent opted to hold off until the Keeneland sales in Kentucky. No worries, I also did not know what a bloodstock agent was until I met a very handsome one the other night. Now I know bloodstock agents are paid a commission to buy and sell horses. If I ever catch up with the handsome fella from the other night, I will ask for his assistance in explaining his role in the horse racing world. TBC…
Meantime, let’s get back to butts. While researching a few things on horse racing, I came across an ab-fab horse forum with photos of….http://www.horseforum.com/horse-pictures/big-butts-25771/ HORSE BUTTS!!!
Check it out for yourself..
http://www.horseforum.com/horse-pictures/big-butts-25771/
Oh before I forget, my Tuesday at the sales was purely social. Although I once again stared at butts and watched yet another $1.2 million dollar sale — it was with my gal pals over wine. Always a great time to run into friends new and old and chat about the next social event of the season or figure out what time everyone is meeting at Siro’s Friday night.
And if you haven’t been to the Fasig-Tipton building recently, you need to go and check out the amazing work of Bonacio Construction on the renovation. It’s gorgeous. Like whoa.
Cheers my friends….up next, “Jake’s Help from Heaven.”