When Nancy met Eli, they were both looking for something. Though unable to express it in words, Eli was in need of a home, of a friend and partner, of a person who could care for him and grow with him. Nancy had felt something missing for some time when she met Eli. Having had to give up on the dream of having a child, there was a definite void in her life. It was the void of not having someone to care for, to nurture, and to raise. And then came Eli. A six-year-old former racehorse with the tendency to spook at the simplest things–think birds, shrubs, for example–Eli needed nurturing. His life had changed from the steady routine on the racetrack he was used to. He needed a constant in his life, and that would be Nancy.
When Nancy met Eli, they were both looking for something. Though unable to express it in words, Eli was in need of a home, of a friend and partner, of a person who could care for him and grow with him. Nancy had felt something missing for some time when she met Eli. Having had to give up on the dream of having a child, there was a definite void in her life. It was the void of not having someone to care for, to nurture, and to raise. And then came Eli. A six-year-old former racehorse with the tendency to spook at the simplest things–think birds, shrubs, for example–Eli needed nurturing. His life had changed from the steady routine on the racetrack he was used to. He needed a constant in his life, and that would be Nancy.
On her husband’s suggestion, Nancy decides to take up riding again. After life and career forced her years-long hiatus, getting back in the saddle was a challenge which forces her to face her own insecurities and perceived shortcomings–both on horseback and off. Making the commitment to have her own horse changed the game. It upped the stakes. Much like parenting a child, when you are responsible for the welfare of a horse, you are forced to rise to the occasion and put their needs ahead of your own. Nancy could no longer dwell on what she thought she was doing wrong, she had to learn everything, from the ground up, and she had to get it right. For Eli’s sake. And that she did.
Falling for Eli is a love story, for certain. But it’s also a story of hope; the hope of fulfilling the desire to give–love, time, energy, patience. It’s a story of change; facing it, embracing it, and finally seeking it out and making a new life for oneself. It’s a family saga; from the early days of welcoming a new family member to the long nights–that sometimes turn into months–caring for a sick and injured family member. It’s a diary of learning and growth; we experience Nancy’s ups and downs as a rider and as a horse parent. We learn what she learns and follow her through her equine education as we are given a first-hand account of her different trainers and different barns. She shares her setbacks of knowledge, of experience, and of confidence with honesty and frankness and displays enviable strength and resilience in the face of sometimes frightening situations. Even when it seems she’s unsure if she can face the potential consequences of the situation–for example Eli’s EPM*–she is the ultimate mother to Eli, using every resource available to give him the best care.
Nancy’s journey begins with trepidation and a good deal of self-doubt. But just as Nancy gives Eli the home and the love he needs, he provides her what she needed as well: the opportunity to give of herself in a way that only the parenting experience provides. He needs Nancy in a way that any child would need their parent–entirely. They both become whole because of the other. Today, sixteen years since Eli trotted into Nancy’s life, they are still partners, their relationship growing and evolving every day.
I have to thank Nancy Shulins for writing Falling for Eli. Reading this book turned out to be a very personal experience for me, as I find myself at the same age, and in the same position as Nancy was when she begins her tale. I too have had to abandon the dream of having a family and I relate entirely to the vast range of emotions that she so openly shared and that ultimately led her back to riding and to Eli. Coincidentally, I too have a six-year-old former Thoroughbred racehorse that has caught my eye. I’m not sure if she’s my horse yet, but she may very well be my Eli. Fingers crossed.
*EPM is Equine Protozoal Myeloencephalits. It is a parasite born disease of the central nervous system and can be difficult to diagnose as it can mimic other neurological diseases. Worst-case scenarios include blindness, muscle atrophy, and the inability to stand.